“No” means “Yes”

We get beat down and overwhelmed by life and all the things we “need” to do. We often do a horrible job not doing and being to everything and everyone. We forget there are consequences to a life without boundaries. In a word, that means chaos.

How do we bring forth order from chaos? The first step is learning to say, “No.”

Most of us hate to say the word. After all saying “Yes” to things makes us feel like a good, caring person. It’s also a whole lot easier and doesn’t require any justification. “Yes,” as good-intentioned as it feels, unrestrained and unchecked, is perhaps the quickest path to chaos.

“No” is a word about limits and boundaries. We often think of limits as a choice, but the reality is that many of our limits are not a choice. Our time, energy, emotions all have limits. When it’s gone, it’s gone.

I think this requires us to make a huge mental shift: Saying “No” to some things means saying “Yes” to other things.

How about your dreams? What if you have a goal that requires a certain amount of time? As Dr. Henry Cloud points out, we should say, “No” to preserve the life of our dreams, goals and the things that are most important.

If everything is a priority, then nothing is a priority.

Usually the first casualties are ourselves and those closest to us; our spouses, children, dreams, health and emotional well-being.

These things can’t be preserved if you don’t say “No” to other things. The important things get lost in the chaos of a life without boundaries. This doesn’t mean being irresponsible, it means being honest with yourself and those around you.

Your activities reflect what your priorities are. Is your time focused on the things that are most important or would it be better to say “No?” Today may be a good time to pause and consider if what you’re doing is taking you in the direction you want to go.